Asterios blew the fuckin’ doors off the show in episode #98. We start with a Marc Summers (of Double Dare!) college story, and end with a little shoplifting.
We’ve double-checked, and it’s confirmed Greg Burmeister is the first guest we’ve had whose college experience included a 4-day coma.
The man is a party machine (although that is NOT what led to his coma!) and his college experience was less of the campus life, and more of the rock & roll life. Greg played in bands throughout college (Cue The Doves & Galaxy Queen), then he managed bands, and generally tore up Minneapolis, St. Paul, and the surrounding area during his time at Minnesota’s University of Northwestern. He also is the first College Stories guest with a story that involves brass knuckles, the cops, and yelling about how much he loves jail!
We asked Greg a question he gets a lot: “What do you do?” and while he isn’t quite sure, we know that besides being a rock & roll guitarist, he’s also been an actor (Broad City), TV personality (truTV), and worked in TV production (Celebrity Apprentice & The Late Show). He also hosted a public access show called Beatboxing With Greg where he straight up just beatboxed AT a guest for a half hour. Incredible stuff.
Kenny followed a great high school basketball career by playing one more year at Drury University, then aiming his competitive spirit at All-America level partying, culminating in one of the most insane nights we’ve had on this show (beginning at about minute 50).
He takes us through his transition from recruited college athlete to his early retirement. We hear about the surf culture of Missouri (weirdly, there IS one), the diverse array of white dudes who made up his frat, and one innocent young man who went epically crazy on one party night, with Kenny chasing him the whole way. Bullhorns, break-ins, surprise rap battles — this night has everything.
Before the college talk: we discuss how every life problem in NYC becomes hack, because it’s also a problem for half the other comedians in the world, and Kenny tells us how sometimes the subject of your Instagram photos can hunt you down.
Usually, we write a notable fact about the guest’s “college story” here. But for Mara Marek, all you need to know is that her life is NUTS. She’s had about 8 full lives, and she has no idea why she’s not dead.
Cliff Cash is a very funny, unique comic who dropped out of college and made a bunch of money real fast. Like Bill Gates! Then, well, things got weird. But it was a baller couple years!
Georgetown’s Joe Gerics describes in great detail their beef with Syracuse, we talk about the shock of people in college who are incredibly comfortable being naked in public, moms who do your college applications for you, and how to say “King of Cocksucker” in German, and a few other foreign language swears. Joe was also a part-time, hard-core partier at Fairfield U, closer to his hometown, to the point where he met his eventual “Best Man” there — in spite of his drunkest night.
Joe also talks about getting into comedy by watching an all-star Georgetown University improv team (with Mike Birbiglia, John Mulaney and Nick Kroll). Kevin and Joe tell the stories of how they did their first open mics in stand-up, and how actually writing a 5-minute set makes you incredible in your first mic, regardless of whether it’s funny or not.
Harvard’s Alyssa Wolff has one big thing in common with Ball State’s Kevin: drunk Halloween college fights. Dressed as a lady village person, Alyssa stood up for her friend at a Chinese restaurant bar in Boston and told us all about it. That wasn’t her biggest hit: she also crashed into a very important person’s house, at a very important time.
She also randomly ended up living next door — in college — from her best friend from childhood. She dives into the differences between Ivy League schools, and being a college classmate of Weezer’s Rivers Cuomo. And guess what? Harvard wasn’t even her FIRST CHOICE!
It’s another deleted scenes episode! Sometimes, our guests have TOO much good stuff, and when that happens, we collect the tangents, and off-the-rails stories, and put them in a big grab bag of fun, and call ’em “Deleted Scenes.” On today’s episode #90: comedian/writer Steve O’Brien (original ep #72), MTV/VH1 producer Kim Reynolds (#74), director Kris Knight (#75), comedian George Gordon (#77), producer Nick Blake (#87), comedian/writer/Twitter genius Patrick Monahan (#81). And, of course, Kevin, Jaimie, and Jon. It’s fun!
We play a lot of college hits in this episode with very funny comedian & author Alyssa Wolff (Lean Over: Women, Work, and Women’s Work)!
Jon asks if Harvard is actually harder than other schools (spoiler: they have a class called “Cosmic Connections”), we talk about the unique kind of homeless person that hangs out at Harvard — is it like that one movie with Brendan Fraser?
We also talk about how dating in college is super unclear — are we dating? Like, person reading this — are we dating right now? Who can even tell! Too many group hangs! College dating is basically Bachelor In Paradise, as Jaimie rightly says.
And we talk about the weird relationship we all have with food in college: free ice cream, the freshman 15, the sophomore/junior overcorrect, and more! Follow Alyssa on Twitter @alyssawolff and buy her book: Lean Over!